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Writer's pictureMegStanierCelebrant

Wedding Ceremony Ideas | Unity Candles

Two taper candles with pillar unity candle

Unity candles are a perfect way to symbolise the joining together of your two lives. For this special part of your ceremony, you will need:


  • Candles (obvious I know):

    A large pillar candle & two taper candles. You can choose candles to match your colour scheme/wedding theme if you wish! You can order some on Etsy/online, there are some beautiful designs out there! (Pictured: AgaMakesCandles) OR you can make them yourself like one of my brides did recently (stunning!!)


Floral unity candles on white stand with floral arrangement
  • Candle holders/displays: Make your display pretty, spruce it up to suit your theme, glass holders, lanterns etc. (just be sensible with materials & make sure to have a heat-resistant stand/container!)


  • Matches or lighter: You'll need matches or a lighter to hand for lighting the two taper candles. 

  • Your celebrant will make sure everything you need is present before beginning the ceremony.


Logistics

You can have your candle ceremony written into your wedding ceremony script wherever you like, but your celebrant will most likely make some suggestions depending on the following:

  • Who will be involved in your ceremony

  • Your couples quiz answers

  • Your ceremony space

  • Your readings/other elements you've chosen to add


It is completely dependent on ceremony choices, the structure of your wedding ceremony and who is involved.... but here are a few ideas!


  • Have your mothers/fathers/siblings (whoever you like!) light the taper candles at the beginning of your ceremony, usually just after everyone is welcomed. If you choose someone from both sides of your family, this can signify your two separate families you've be a part of since the day you were born.

    After your loves story has been told, you have said your wedding vows to each other & exchange rings, you will take these two candles and light your pillar candle together, signifying your families and friends joining together.

Bridesmaid in lilac handing taper candle to bride and groom.
  • Just before your vows, you will select a guest or your 'match maker' to walk to the front and light the two taper candles, which will then be handed to you. Your celebrant will then talk about what the fire represents e.g. your separate lives, paths and families. They may also use metaphors for love and fire & how this relates to your personal story together. You will then be asked to light the pillar candle to represent your marriage. As the flame burns, you will recite your vows to each other, exchange rings and be introduced as husband and wife.

Bride and Groom lighting the unity candle
  • You may also wish to light a separate candle for absent relatives/friends.


Ceremony pairings

A unity candle ceremony would pair perfectly with:


  • Band warming: To be started just before the ceremony begins, each guest will hold the rings and make silent wishes, when the rings reach the front, they will be exchanged and the candle lit.

  • Remembrance: Also light a candle for absent friends and family members.

  • First Kiss/Last Kiss: Parents come back to the front after lighting the candles earlier in the ceremony, they will then give their children a kiss to send them into married life, the candle will then be lit by the happy couple.

  • Group Vow: Everyone is now symbolically joined together by your love, now would be the perfect time for a group vow of love and support... WE DO!

  • Parchment signing: As the candle burns you sign your decorative wedding parchment.

  • Unity Shot: A different kind of fire... pick a jagerbomb, tequila or whatever your tipple of choice!

  • Readings: Love is Friendship Caught Fire, Laura Hendricks or Wedding Poem by Whitney Hanson

Bride and Groom holding taper candles before lighting the unity candle

Useful tips:


  • Check with your venue before adding this to your wedding ceremony, most venues I've worked with don't mind if the flame is blown out after the ritual.

  • Outside weddings... keep in mind the wind. Unity candle ceremonies may prove difficult, perhaps opt for a handfasting or sand ceremony or other alternatives - unless you don't mind the humour of it going out!

  • Your celebrant will be able to come up with some wording for this ritual, if you have any ideas/inspiration, make sure to tell them! My personal preference are metaphors and poetry!

  • Shop around for candles, or research how to make your own!


For more ceremony ideas, check our my wedding celebrant blog!


Happy planning! Meg x

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